Wow. Today was absolutely the longest day I have had as a teacher this far. It’s four weeks into the school year, and I knew that assigning the kids’ research paper was going to be a hurdle, but I didn’t expect what I got. For my first day in complete control of the classroom, I was hoping for a little easier of a time. On one hand, working in an urban setting is the most eye opening and soul-fulfilling experience one will ever have, and on the other hand it’s the most frustrating and testing. I have never met more endearing (some, at times) and more frustrating (most of them, most of the time) kids in my life. There are some that sincerely want to learn and are trying so hard to understand, and there are some that have blatant disregard for anything anyone does or says. This is so different from my own high school experience and I cannot understand how this happens to teachers on a daily basis. I can’t imagine acting the way these kids do towards my teachers, or having anyone in my high school classrooms that acted this way. I know that I am in a completely different environment from an all girls, catholic high school, but we are still humans! Goodness, today, these children absolutely exhausted me.
In other news, planning for school has gone really smoothly, I have planned through the entire month of September, and the first few days of October. It has been a blessing that everything I have planned has magically fit perfectly into each and every bell. And when I do have a few minutes extra, the kids (usually) read quietly or talk softly. The only other worry I have niggling away at me is my mentor teacher. I sometimes feel as though she doesn’t completely trust my abilities, and maybe she doesn’t, but the evidence of this can be very discouraging at times. She seems to occasionally get impatient with me, or make me feel as though I am doing something wrong without giving me direction or constructive criticism. I hate to say it, but this happening a few times today, and also the reaction I had from the children had me seriously questioning my career choice, again. I know that this happens a lot, especially for new teachers, or anyone for their first time in the field, but I am really worried. I hope this gets better over the coming fourteen weeks.
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Lastly, today we picked up Guillermo. I was a little disappointed to see find him sleeping on the blanket that we left with him overnight. it was mainly used as a receptacle for his pee, I was hoping they would have someone there at night to walk the kenneled dogs, or else not give them food or water for the 12 hours they were there. Other than that, he seems his normal self! Digging imaginary holes, playing tug, and trying his hardest to jump onto the couches (which isn’t allowed to do for four days!). He cried the whole way home, and shook, too, because he was so excited to see us! I am happy to have him home again and hopefully we wiped away any fears of abandonment he may have had. ;)
I hope everyone had a more uplifting day than I did, back tomorrow with another update :) Don’t forget to drop me a note if you are stopping by, or to click the little “Follow” button over to the side of this column!
xoxo S
stick with it you can do it! I just give you major props for going into it even though you aren't 100% sure you want to stick with it. That takes major dedication. the good thing is that the experience can never hurt and either way you will know you have given it a try. I hope things with your mentor teacher improves. that can be frustrating. Just think....one day (sometime very soon) you will have a classroom all to yourself where you can set the mood of the classroom and make decisions for yourself and your students :)
ReplyDeletethanks, this means a lot!! today was much better, and I am glad that I went in with a better outlook. i can't wait to have my own classroom, and hopefully enjoy teaching much more!
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